Thursday, February 23, 2012

Well...I've never been so insulted in all my lunchtimes...



Hello Burnfans!

How are you?  Gravy?  Terrific?  Wonderful?

Well...I hope that you ate something other than shit for dinner....because you're about to vomit with blind fury and rage!  Yeah.  I know.  Why?  Because I was attacked...attacked I tell you...by a blogger...and I didn't even fucking well know it!!!!!  A blogger by the name of Blog In A Tea Cup attacked my new blog.  Her message to me (or rather...about me!!)?  Stop it with the fucking photos and start getting angry about shit that nobody gives a fuck about...you've become a cunt.

Yeah...that's right.

Well...here's the part where I cut and paste her hurtful words -

"Anyway, this is the reblog - sorry for the rant :) I actually went off ole Burndog a bit and actually unsubscribed from his now main Tumblr blog as he apparently got a new smartphone or discovered Instagram or something because he started filling his blog with slightly wanky Instagrammed photos of pretty much nothing anyone else but him would have any interest in seeing (and even then I can't imagine him being thrilled to look at those pictures more than once), rather than the bile-filled but well written rants I quite enjoy reading, but hey, it's his blog."

Alright.  I'll wait.  I will give you poor cunts a minute to dry your eyes.  It's hurtful isn't it?  Firstly...the camera is a very nice Sony NEX-5...and the photos are all taken with proper lenses.  Yeah.  None of that Instagram nonsense.  I loathe Instagram...and smartphone photography in general.  So...that stung.  Slightly wanky?  SLIGHTLY FUCKING WANKY???  I'll have you know that I consider most of those photos to be incredibly wanky...totally wanky...utterly and arse bleedingly wanky!  Slightly?!?!?! How dare you!  I will have you know that I am thrilled to look at my photos more than once.  I re-read my blog from the first post to the last every single day.  Every single fuckiing DAY!!!!!!  Do you know why?  Because I'm Burndog.  I know that to be the best...I have to beat the best....and because I am the best...I have analyse my own shit every fucking day...just so that tomnorrow I can be better than myself!  Is that easy?  No.  Is that in any way rewarding?  Yes.  When I think of the joy that my blog has brought to the millions eight loyal Burnfans who read my blogs (I still don't know why I have four at the moment)...well...it brings a tear to my eye.

Today....I cry for a different reason.  Yes, I cry because it appears that a fellow Aussie has stabbed me in the heart...but I also cry because...deep down...I know that...she was right.  The photos are terrible.  The odd photo is fine...but...I've been posting photos of anything and everything....I've become...my own worst nightmare.  Photos. Who knew that I would become that guy? 

So...to show the height of my humility...I offered a peace treaty.  If the blogger is willing to call me 'Dragon Slayer' and return to the world a loyal Burnfan...then I shall never post more than two of my own photos in any given week.  On any of the blogs.  I swear. 

Now, I'm off to crawl into a little ball and cry myself to sleep.


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